Queen of the Damned

poor adaptation.
lestat now a reznor clone.
in book too? oh snap.

Transylvania 6-5000

this has not aged well
geena davis: sexy vamp
wtf

Mindhunters

he’s unstoppable!
but allow me to spoil you:
his weakness is bullets

BloodRayne

it seems you weren’t told
no tank tops in the dark ages
michelle rodriguez

Don’t Look in the Basement!

don’t go down those stairs
at least not ’til the ending.
the plot twist lives there 

Stay Alive

stars frankie muniz
as a funky fresh gamer.
die quickly, malcolm 

Code Hunter

computer-made storm
drop a nuke on it, why not?
hey, there’s coolio! 

Wild Side

once you have seen it
you can never un-see it:
walken/heche sex scene

Warning: Some NSFW language (and it gets worse from there).

Fire & Ice

 

This ski man is in danger.

 

 

oh, who could resist
the world of pro ski dancing?
besides everyone 

 

Feed

 

There's just more to love.

 

 

i hunger no more
my appetite is gone now
scene with pan-fried wang