Masterblaster

Warning: This movie is not about dirty men using tiny women as handguns.

Warning: This movie is not about dirty men using tiny women as firearms.

killer needs a theme.
paintball tournament, why not?
oh god, just shoot me.

Major spoilers: This clip shows the big reveal of the film (because you’re totally going to track this movie down and watch it).

This movie is like Discount Stock Character Warehouse: Along with the people featured in the clip (broody biker, italian hitman, black guy, perky cop, prissy bitch, racist hillbillies, mysterious asian, crazy latino) there’s scholarly gent, huffy actor, troubled veteran, cocky rock star, and karate lady (!!).

The twist is needlessly complicated — a killer with a secret connection to the hero kills scores of innocent people in thematic, dramatic ways before coming at the main target directly (like Urban Legend) and a climactic transformation of the villain from mild-mannered civilian to completely off-the-rails sociopath (also like Urban Legend, where Rebecca Gayheart’s hair grows three times its normal size).

Choice quote:
Rowdy redneck: Hey baby, you gonna come to the bar with me?
Prissy bitch: Will they serve Dom Pérignon?
Rowdy redneck: Sheee-it, they’ll serve anybody!

Advertisements
Tagged , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: